‘Twas three months before Christmas and something was weird,
A time meant for pumpkins, not the man with the beard.
But low and behold on that first day of fall
Stood a large Christmas tree, about 10 feet tall.

What the hell I thought, is it not still September?
What is so hard about this to remember?
Everything is rushed and just feels so wrong!
It seems we have Christmas carols all the year long.

Back-to-school ads and sweaters start in the summer,
Fall holidays competing with Santa, is a bummer.
On New Year’s we buy valentines, it’s all much too fast!
There’s no time to enjoy, to make each moment last.

On talk shows, in books, in magazines, we’re learning
To be in the moment, not focus on yearning
For things and for times in the past or the future,
Be thankful, show love, and for thyself nurture.

Mixed messages come in all shapes and all sizes,
Shop Thanksgiving night or you’ll miss all the prizes.
Grab precious time with the fam, now cut shorter
As stores open early to welcome the hoarders.

What has happened, I ask, to our old-fashioned meals?
Relaxing and waxing, with no care about deals.
Telling stories, and laughing til our tummies are full,
This shopping Black Friday, now Thursday, is bull!

With all of this rushing, time goes by in a flash,
Please make room for loved ones in place of panache.
Cherish the best gift we can ever receive:
Sharing joy, love and hugs, I do believe!

On that note my friends, I wish to say this:

Thank you for reading and sharing your time,
For reading my blogs and this holiday rhyme.
Take the time to look, taste, feel, and hear,
All that you’re blessed with, and those you hold dear!

With warmth and gratitude,
Nancy Lang

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Relationships without judgment

The other day I got a voicemail from a long-time friend. She told me she read something funny that reminded her of me, and she had to call to tell me. Hearing this and the smile in her voice put a big one on my face, and in my heart.

Every single day we make a difference in the lives of others whether we realize it or not. A smile, holding the door open, giving someone a parking place, or not; being patient with a senior, listening to a child, returning someone’s call; or not, or just saying hello, can make a difference in a person’s day. For better or worse, our actions and words have a ripple effect, stirring a person’s pool of emotions. This current continues flowing, affecting more and more people throughout the day, or even longer.

We must be aware that our behavior (whether it’s pleasant, loving, curt, or judgmental) has a domino effect, and we must realize that we each have a responsibility and a choice as to how we wish to make a difference. Will we perpetuate consideration and respect, or will we perpetuate discrimination and hypocrisy?

It is my observation that how we behave or what we say, is often provoked by the differences between us. Differences such as lifestyles and religious beliefs are at the core of many conflicts from an international level to the family dinner table.

I was recently invited over for dinner to join a group of people whose lifestyles, dress, hair, diets, and beliefs were very different. As it happens when people with differing perspectives gather together, the conversation became quite, shall we say, spirited.

This was a microcosm of the world in its diversity, and it raised many questions in my mind: Why must some people judge others and how they choose to live, believing their way is the right way, and everyone else is wrong? Why can’t we all have our own opinions without feeling the need to prove we’re right, or to try and make others believe the way we do? We don’t have to understand, agree, or even like it, but as long as no one is being hurt or abused, shouldn’t we try to accept other lifestyles?

No one way of life should be more respected than another. If you say you wish to be accepted by friends and family for who you are and what you believe, then don’t bash their lifestyle from the other side of your mouth. If you say you don’t want to be judged, then don’t judge others. If you want to be treated with respect, then for goodness sake, show some respect for others! It has to go both ways. Don’t be a hypocrite. I think this literally defines it:

Hypocrite: a person who claims or pretends to have certain beliefs about what is right but who behaves in a way that disagrees with those beliefs.

Having an awareness of how we treat others is also crucially important for the next generation. Hate and discrimination are taught from generation to generation. This is one reason why we have so much hate in the world, and it starts at home. As Steven Sondheim brilliantly wrote:

Careful the things you say
Children will listen
Careful the things you do
Children will see and learn

If we wish for a better world, we must start within our own. If you wish for your relationships with family or friends to be more cohesive, loving, respectful and non-judgmental, then lead by example. Why, I ask, within our own families, would we allow our differences to create a wall so high and wide that it permanently divides us?

So, once again, it all comes down to choice. We can decide to try and make a positive difference in people’s lives every day, or not. We can decide to allow our differences to come between us, or not. Remember, however, that your choice will have a ripple effect affecting not only those who travel in your wake, but as the current continues, it will find its way rippling right back to you.

 

 

Divorce and the Holidays

I can’t believe it’s already the beginning of November! The stores, however, are quite the reminder that it ’tis the season.’ Although if I remember correctly, in our favorite retail outlets it twas the season in August. I’m personally not a fan of seeing Halloween candy and Christmas trees popping up before kids have even gone back to school, but such is our society.

Since the holidays are now in the forefront of our minds, I thought it would be a good time to share a radio interview I did for CL3 Platform Radio Show and Divorce Support Center, regarding the issues that arise during the holidays for divorced families. I hope you can find time in your schedule between shopping, and shopping some more, to take a listen. For those of you who are divorced, contemplating divorce, or know someone who is, I hope this will be of some help and that you will share it with others.

I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below!

Click Here to Listen! Hear Nancy discuss Divorce and the Holidays on Blog Talk Radio!!

 

 

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